Your self esteem is your evaluation of yourself, how much you value or like yourself. Self esteem encompasses your beliefs about yourself; if you see yourself as a worthy person; if you believe you have the skills to do something. It influences how you react to situations, how you face life’s challenges and how you feel about your abilities to achieve a goal, whether that’s being happy, stopping smoking, losing weight or changing your career.
Why is self esteem so important?
I am passionate about self esteem because when you feel good about yourself, you can then tackle your issues with clarity and perspective. It helps with so many issues such as returning to work after a period of absence/illness, addictions, panic attacks, maintaining a healthy weight and so much more. After all if self esteem encompasses what you believe about yourself and how much you like yourself, then it is underlying everything you do and say, how you act and interact.
How can I start to feel good about myself?
Learning how to acquire high self esteem is like learning how to tie your shoe laces or learning how to drive. You never forget, you can’t unlearn how to do it! It’s a skill that once you know how to do it – you will always do it. In fact you feel so good about yourself you always want to ‘self esteem’ yourself and it becomes part of your everyday routine, like brushing your teeth!
At school you’re taught maths, English and geography but there isn’t a GCSE in ‘How to feel good about myself’. If you allow how you feel about yourself to be based on how you think others think about you, then you are not in control. Your self esteem will always fluctuate depending on other people. This is an opportunity for you to learn how to do this for yourself. You will learn how to
- Process the positive things in your life and playdown any negative events
- Turn any negative, self limiting or destructive thoughts into empowering, positive thoughts
- Stop relying on external things such as other people, luck, fate, chance, pills or potions to feel good about yourself
- Manage your thinking and use your own resources that you are probably unaware that you actually possess at this moment
- Control and direct your own life and feel really good about yourself
- Create any changes you want and acquire new ways of thinking about unexpected or ‘out of control’ type events
- Understand yourself and learn to like and care about yourself
- Acquire skills to deal with those unpredictable events and setbacks in life
- Develop lifetime skills and knowledge to use for the rest of your life.
- Value yourself and feel good about the unique person that make you YOU!
Of course you can do the things and make the changes you want – you just don’t believe you can, based on your beliefs at this time and how you feel about yourself at the moment. These are just some of the changes my clients have made in their lives as a result of self esteem work –
Personal Life – Losing weight; stopping smoking or other addictions; getting married; falling in love (and back in love!); asking someone out on a date; having fun with their children; making more ‘me’ time; liking themselves; socialising; personal changes such as wearing makeup, changing style of clothes, hairstyle; saying No; trying new things; learning a new skill such as guitar or fishing; trying a new hobby such as dancing, acting; talking to other parents in the school playground; stopping blushing; stopping worrying or caring about what they think other people are thinking about them.
Professional Life – Changing career; getting promoted; starting a new business; returning to work after absence/illness; giving presentations; making cold business calls; improving their sales techniques; increasing productivity and efficiency; reaching and surpassing targets; going into the canteen; joining in with groups; stopping worrying about what their boss or colleagues or customers think about them; managing motorway driving fears; calm public speaking
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